July 12, 2008
More of a reflection than a story：
Attitude; never have I truly understood the importance of this concept/ word until this trip. Never have I understood that attitude is beyond a perception one chooses to have for certain or all situations but rather attitude is an ability that we can choose to improve or deteriorate an experience. Agree or agree to disagree.
Thus far I have used my attitude “ability” to criticize and complicate many cultural experiences I’ve come across here in Shenyang. I’ve become a master at making my trifle frustrations into complicated catastrophes. I know that because of my previous attitude, like a spoiled child, I have made others quite aware of my anxieties and irritations in cultural challenges; I might as well have used a bullhorn to say “that’s weird and non-American, why can’t I just have it my way”. With this in mind my attitude, thus far, has sucked; excuse my French.
This revelation has come with a heavy dosage of humility that I’m sure will last for many hard times to come, beyond China. This revelation has also brought me to a crossroads were I must wake up in the morning and make a decision before even putting my feet to the floor; shall I use by “attitudability” to make this day one of joy and positive outlook or make what could be a day of many challenges into a day of many defeats? Thankfully God has renewed a right spirit within me, making this decision not only easier but amazingly satisfactory in understanding that a good “attitudability” will make me a stronger man the next day because I’m able to overcome the current day’s challenges with a positive outlook. Granted, many things God has graciously done within me, including this revelation, come after much doubt, hesitation, and fight on my part against his will. Beyond my unintimidating less than six-foot stature is a ferocious and nasty Brandon that would gladly choose a bad attitude and the not-so-godly ways of life. God on the other has filled me with awe, joy, excitement, and boldness to pursue this new attitude and its ability to transform my day’s adventures. All this in hopes that I’d resemble a slightly more Christ-like man the day after the current days challenges.
So, thus far my attitudability has stunk. However, from now on I hope to view China’s differences and this opportunity’s challenges as an chance to develop a new “attitudability”. So beyond eating raw chicken feet and the many prolonged frustrating conversations lost in translation each day will offer me a chance to see from God’s eyes and to continually be filled with joy over the opportunities and blessings I am given to conquer and relish. I hope this page of thoughts is an encouragement for your day’s challenges. And yes, I did create the cool word “attitudability” and plan on calling Webster and his dictionary about it when I return.
